"Never walk-in with your eyes closed."
There is a book in the bible that I love. It is called Proverbs, because Its meanings pertain to dark sayings, or wise counsels about life. It encourages me "to teach people to live disciplined and successful lives, by helping them do what is right, just, and fair."
Proverbs 1: 3, NIV.
"My date opened the front door for me, walked me to his sporty ride, and helped me into the passenger seat. "Cool car," I thought. "Was he trying to impress me, or being the perfect gentleman?"
Not quite looking at me.
The worst thing in the world... is not being in danger, it's not knowing you are! I remember trying to get back on the dating scene after splitting up with my daughter's father. Although, we remained friends, I was ready to do me gain. My roll-girl, from high school had just reconnected with me. "Let me hook you up with my cousin on my Dad side," she said. Of course, I was nervous and excited at the same time, but was all in. She knew I had a new baby girl, and offered to babysit for free. I was a very protective mother, but trusted her, "okay." Everything was going good, until she said...But. "But, what," I asked. "There's one thing you should know, before you meet him," she added. I braced myself, while she forewarned me, "he has a crossed eye." Silence took over the conversation, as I tried picturing his crossed eye in my head. No disrespect, but even though this was during the 90's, when Faith Evans and Biggie Smalls seemed to make their's work, I was skeptical. "How bad is it," I inquired? She tried hard to convince me that he wasn't terrible looking, he just had that condition. My roll-girl told me to go out, see if I liked him, if not-- stop talking. I didn't want to seem shallow, so I agreed to at least meet him. She put us on three-way call; we exchanged numbers, and took things from there.
Date night on the dating scene.
Being a new mom made me extra protective, so, I didn't tell him where I lived. We met up at my roll-girl's place. I arrived first, knocked on the door with my baby girl, and waited for him to show up. If he had stood me up, there wouldn't be a second chance. Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. From head to toe, he came dressed in all white. He had a nice build, low cut, and clean shave, but just like she forewarned, I couldn't tell if he was looking at me. My date opened the front door for me, walked me to his sporty ride, and helped me into the passenger seat. "Cool car," I thought. "Was he trying to impress me, or being the perfect gentleman?" Either way, this extremely independent woman, knew it felt good to let him. He got into the driver seat inquiring if I was comfortable. This guy may be a winner, I thought. But, something deeper told me it was too early to tell.
We drove to an up scale restaurant in Torrance, placed our orders, and talked while we waited on our food. Getting to know me was equally important as wanting to learn about him. My date was eager to tell me how he made his money. I cut him off before he could get it out. "Don't tell me how you make your money. What I don't know won't hurt." He looked in my direction as much as he could, smiled, took out a wad of money, paid the check, and gave me gas money since he didn't pick me up.
"Tainted wealth has no lasting value,but right living can save your life." Proverbs 10:2 NLT.
Staying in the dark with my eyes closed.
Now, I was never a materialistic girl, and I always held my own, but for the first time it felt nice to have somebody kicking me down. Was I making a decision to walk-in with my eyes closed? We drove back to my roll-girl's house and ended our first date. He was a lot more attracted to me than I was to him, but I was giving it a shot. It was time for a second date. My address was still off limits. We met up at my roll-girl's place. He was running behind schedule. "Where was he, nope I'm leaving?" I thought. He sensed something and asked me to wait for him, as a matter of fact, he said. "I gotta make a stop, and want you to take a ride with me." He pulled up, I got into his car and we drove off. "Were you going to leave me," he asked? "Yes, I would have been gone," I answered. We pulled up to a motel room on Long Beach Blvd.
It was pitch black. I was never a street girl, but knew being on the Blvd at a motel meant endangerment. My eyes were still closed to how he made his money. I sat in the car while he went inside. He felt bad for having me sitting in the car so long, and brought me out a cherry wood mahogany clock for my dresser. I really liked my clock, thanked him, and assumed he was into hot merchandising. We pulled off and headed back to my roll-girl's place. He parked, and went into the bedroom, while I talked to my roll-girl. My roll-girl started laughing, as she heard him fussing and cussing before I did. "They got you," she said. It took me a minute to realize what was happening, until he came out the bedroom, into the living room wagging his gun around. Before I realized it, my motherly instincts kicked in. "Put that gun away before you hurt my baby." My roll-girl kept laughing as I wondered what kind of maniac I was dating. In exchange for his cash, they handed him a bag of flour at the motel room. He began to apologize, but I got my baby and left. Two dates, told me everything I needed to know. I was not just living for me; I had an innocent daughter to protect.
"For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs." I Timothy 6:10, NIV.
Blinded by money.
The next day he called me to apologize again. He wanted to see me, but still didn't know where I lived. I remember thinking, what if he had some stuff in my house, and the police was tracking him. They would have raided my house, arrested me, and took my baby from me. I was really a smart girl, but didn't know I had gone so far away from my values. Suddenly, I knew playing blind was not a good idea. but something convinced me to meet him one more time at a restaurant down the street from my house. Jordan's in watts. He didn't know I lived over there, but he was getting closer to the proximity of my domain. Did I really, need a last meet? We sat at the restaurant and talked about everything that happened. I didn't like the fact that he put us all in danger, but more importantly, I wanted someone willing to make an honest living. But it was my last question that helped me make my final decision. "If you weren't trying to hurry back to me in the car at the motel room, what would have happened?" He looked at me, as much as he could... and said, "I would have checked the product, and they would have killed me. And because you were outside in the car they would have had to kill you too." Those words pierced through me. Instantly, I knew nobody but God saved me, and used that situation to open my eyes. I told him we couldn't see each other anymore, walked away, and never looked back. I hope he understood, that he was bad at the game, and should get out too. A short while later, I gave my life to Christ. What will it take for you, or someone you love? It all depends on whether they're willing to learn from others life lessons.
There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death. Proverbs 14:12, NIV.
LA~ Truth Tips
Don't close your eyes, good and evil don't mix.
Being a single mother does not mean settling for a potentially dangerous person.
Never let material gain make a decision about your life.
Take the exit God gives you when he offers it.
Accept the truth and use your better judgement.
References:
Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved. Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). Endangerment. In Merriam-Webster.com legal dictionary. Retrieved May 11, 2020, from https://www.merriam-webster.com/legal/endangerment.
The Holy Bible, new international version. (1984). Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House.
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